Couple of rookie mistakes today. The first was embracing the sunshine and swapping my trainers for open toed shoes; the second was trying to teach twin boy and girl how to roller skate alone in open toed shoes….
twin boy
a lost libido…
Lost: one sex drive
I have looked everywhere, under the bed, in the fridge, even in the garage and no success. I did manage to find a mouldy tomato, a long ago forgotten set of pyjamas and my collection of Bros Records but my sex drive remains hidden from view.
Tell me why?
There are some key advantages to being five.
Slapped in the face with a raw, wet kipper….
Dear teacher,
I feel we have formed a bond over the last five weeks and I can move past writing to you in diary form and just address you direct. I am here as the ghost of school days future, appearing in front of you as warning to appreciate the present and don’t do as I did and waste the time you had. You know how twin boy and girl went to stay with their nanny for two weeks and he who helped create them and I got to stay home alone with beautiful baby; well guess what I did?
Parental Happiness Is….
Parental Happiness is…
Exiting the house before 9am without suffering a sore throat from all that shouting.
Struggling into a pair of size twelve jeans without a five year old asking why don’t you buy clothes that fit?