At times I feel like a right mardy arse, December arrives and my Christmas excitement grows but, as is par for the course I start to look forward to putting the previous year behind me and starting afresh.
It seems like every December I dwell on the shite that popped up throughout the year and forget all the joy that the twelve months gave me.
This year being no exception.
When I reflect on the year, all that seems to stick out in memory is that my daughter spent half the year limping around on crutches plagued by an invisible pain and the fact that my marriage finally died on its arse.
It is getting a bit boring having crappy years. But the temptation to drown in a five-year long cocktail of Diabetes, Hip dysplasia, Epilepsy, CRPS, hypoglycemia and divorce is often overwhelming. I am not ashamed to admit that once or twice a year it simply climbs on top of me and tries to suffocate me with sadness for things never going the way I planned.
If I force myself; if I try really hard; I can see the good in 2014.
It was the year I shed most of my belly, where I replaced my love of fish and chips with mussels and sweet potatoes. It was the year where my oldest girl fought a tremendous battle with an agonising pain and learnt to run again. My youngest daughter walked into her first day of school without a sign of a limp and my son continues to grow in character, wit and strength.
2014 was our first time vacationing as merely a mum and her kids, and we had a ball.
It was the year I found CrossFit and managed to deadlift 100kg within my first six months.
It was a year fraught with tough times, juxtaposed next to some amazing achievements.
It was simply a normal year.
Perhaps it is not healthy trying to reject one year with the promise of the next. Blaming the months for misfortune seems to be passing the buck. If life was easy, then it would be stupidly boring.
Some days have been more of a challenge than others, some weeks have been incredible.
When I remember 2014, I will always remember it as a time of change, tears, laughs and smiles.
I can’t blame a year for all that went wrong, so I will celebrate its passing and raise a toast as we wave it goodbye.
Bring on 2015, we are ready and waiting.