2017 has been more about eating my greens and staying out of the treat jar.
2016 was pretty much about swimming in the treat jar.
Perhaps 2018 will be more about balance?
But seriously, this year, I am trying to be kinder to myself. Not telling myself I am on a diet – because it is all about good nutrition dahling, and likewise not convincing myself that one chocolate biscuit means the whole day is a calorie consumption overload.
My all or nothing personality means trying to moderate myself and achieve a balance is a challenge.
I have trained less. My love of CrossFit hasn’t dissipated but my annoyance at myself for becoming less fit over the three years has become a dominating factor in my workouts.
When I started training, back in 2014, the voice in my head would boom loud during work outs…
You are doing this! Holy cow balls – you are really doing this.
I left feeling revitalised, energised, proud of what my body could do. But in recent months that voice has taken on a vulgar tone…
You are dying, you used to be faster, why are you even here?
That pride has becoming provoking, and I skulk out of the gym, red faced, ashamed at how I have let my body down.
Because suddenly, after living for a few years without being dominated by scales, by life seems dictated by the weight on the scales.
If I am chubby, then I can’t train, the reason my burpees take an age is because of the spare tire round my middle.
I hate my relationship with my weight.
Last year was a year of achievement for me.
I moved across the country, bought my own home, started in a new business, loved, cared for and brought up three fantastic children.
I have made new friends, started to put down roots. I have even trained a mad puppy to sit and lie at my command. I have hit a couple of personal bests in my training and I’ve trained 2-5 times a week each week.
Why am I not proud? Why do I feel a failure because my dress size is a 14 not a 10 as it once was.
Even as I type the words I see the ridiculousness of my own words.
So I am looking for balance.
I am eating well, trying to drink an abundance of water. Plus I am having the odd treat and glass of wine, because I really like a glass of wine.
I am not beating myself up for training less but am trying to love the training I do. I am walking – miles everyday, just enjoying the peace that comes with it.
For once in my life I am trying to not be all or nothing. I am aiming for perspective, and trying to appreciate my self worth and my happiness is not dependant on a number on a scale.
Am not going to lie, treating myself and eating well is pretty amazing.
The food that has been going into my jaws has been pretty spectacular of late, I have even re learnt to cook a little bit. It has been tasty.
This week, it has all been about the honey.
To be specific, it has been about some amazing Manuka honey that we were sent to review by Comvita, a New Zealand based natural health company.
Many think eating clean means you don’t have to indulge the sweet tooth but that is simply a big fib. Including Manuka honey in your diet means you can eat well and give your body an internal cuddle at the same time.
Manuka honey originates from New Zealand, and is one of the most unique forms of honey found on the globe. It has a range of uses, from working as a cough syrup to healing cuts and grazes.
Of course – I prefer to ingest mine…
Try this simple recipe to get a real taste of how scrumptious Manuka honey is (you will never buy cheap honey again.)
2 x eggs
3 x tablespoons of Manuka honey
Teaspoon of fresh ginger
2 x tablespoon of olive oil
2 x tablespoon of soy sauce
Salt and pepper
Preheat the oven to 180.
Cover the base of an ovenproof dish with olive oil and spinach.
Pop the salmon on the spinach
Mix up olive oil, soy sauce, honey, ginger, salt and pepper and pour over salmon.
Crack 2 eggs and pour next to salmon.
Pop in oven for 20 minutes and then you are ready to go!
The trick to getting great taste is ensuring you have proper Manuka honey, to ensure you are buying genuine Manuka honey always look for the UMF® quality mark.
The Health Benefits?
It can ease bloated tummies, prevent colds, and give you a massive energy boost. I like to think of it as something that heals from the inside out.
Comvita also produce Manuka honey available in oral spray, or as a sweetener in our Apple Cider Vinegar, so you can access the benefits of Comvita Manuka honey in a variety of easy-to-take forms, for even the fussiest members of your family (of which I have a few!)
Can honey bring happiness?
Probably not on its own.
The same as being a size 10 doesn’t equate a permanent smile on my face. It may be worth noting that this dress size I chase was the one I was when my marriage and old life fell apart….
But I think everyone needs a bit of honey in their world, just to heal from the inside out!