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Northern Mum

Crossfitting, pancreas acting, single mum to three

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Trying a more sober path….

A curious realisation occurred to me this morning as I was out running alongside a French canal.  It was one that has popped. into my mind before in the last few months, and a decision I am coming more and more to desire.

I think I want to cut out alcohol entirely from my lifestyle.

Since changing my diet to predominantly Paleo back in February I have found the day to day benefits to be astounding.  Renewed energy levels, weight loss, a love of working out and better sleep.  I have woken up each morning ready to seize the day and am enjoying every second of life.

Giving up wineThe only time I don’t feel this good is the morning after the night before.

I thought I liked drinking, the pleasant soft feeling that accompanies a glass of wine, the way I find he who helped create them’s jokes funnier after two, the extra confidence boost that usually accompanies a few.

Al Fresco HolidaysBut I don’t feel like I need that anymore, and for the price of a glass of wine I could buy he who helped create them a better joke book.

The first night of our holiday I had half a litre of rose wine.  For a short while I felt hilarious, then I caught sight of myself in the mirror.  My eyes were glazed, my vision blurry, I needed the buggy to support my walk home.

I was officially a lightweight.

I fell to sleep before the kids, and woke up feeling thirsty and still tired in the morning.

I didn’t like it.

Since then, without even thinking, I have not really factored wine (or gin) into our vacation.

And much to my own surprise – I have not missed it.

I had a small glass of beer yesterday afternoon, it was pleasant enough but one was enough.

I barely recognise myself.

Then today, when out on a run, I thought more about giving up for good.

Would it be so hard?  Would I continue to feel so much better?

I am not a fan of never say never, as history has taught me that it can be a foolish mistake.  Proof that nothing is forever for me can be seen everytime I order my steak blue rare – I was a vegetarian for thirteen years.

It is stupid, but I worry, if I cut out the booze will I become Fun Bobby from friends.  The party guy who turns into a solemn bore when he removes alcohol from his life?  Will friends find me tedious to hang out with as I order water to their wine?

At one point last year I drank at least a glass of wine every day (and my glasses are large).  I needed that glass, and if the bottle was empty I would panic a little internally.  I am an all or nothing person and it is hard for me to change this.  Plus I kind of like the way I embrace change and have a determined focus on any thing I choose to do.  Whilst I can take or leave booze, I cannot deny at times it has been a crutch to lean on.

I don’t enjoy the memory that I needed a glass of wine.  I don’t remember with huge enthusiasm the silly arguments that I have had at home following a bottle of wine.  The stupid overshares on Facebook, the morning after fear of checking my phone to see who I texted and what I said.

I think I may be giving up, trying to a sober road for a while.

Is it something you could do?

Comments

  1. Emma says

    June 6, 2014 at 2:42 pm

    wow I admire you if you do this I think. Will you mind being with drunk people – will we seem the weird ones from your non glazed eyes? Are you doing this before or after britmums?

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:56 pm

      You always seemed a bit weird!

      Reply
  2. HELEN says

    June 6, 2014 at 2:55 pm

    have you been hacked?????

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:55 pm

      Ha! funny lady x

      Reply
  3. Grenglish says

    June 6, 2014 at 3:30 pm

    Everything in moderation, including moderation… is my motto!
    I think the difference I have found in my wine drinking habits, is that the glasses on the sofa while watching Eastenders are the ones to break. The next day slump and ‘fear’ are just not worth it. The ones enjoyed on a night out now taste so much better! I also don’t mind the occasional hangover if I have laughed enough with friends the night before.
    There is certainly nothing to lose by giving tee-total a go! I thought I’d NEVER be able to enjoy going out again when I quit ‘social smoking’, but I’ve not had a cig in many years now and if anything, it has made me more sociable, not less. Good luck whatever you decide! xx

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:55 pm

      That is a point – I just struggle with moderation!

      Reply
  4. Jen aka The Mad House says

    June 6, 2014 at 4:08 pm

    I am pretty much tea total. I drink occasionally because I want to but never more than one or two glasses. I am the daughter of heavy drinkers and have been through phases where I drank a lot and hated feeling out of control – not good for a control freak, so now I drink a little and not very often

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:54 pm

      A fellow control freak – hurrah!

      Reply
  5. Ruth says

    June 6, 2014 at 4:59 pm

    Sorry, are you me?! Are we actually one step closer to becoming one and the same? Although your pins go a beautiful shade of bronze whilst my milk bottles are enough to blind any unsuspecting passers by in summer not wearing shades. Anyways, I digress…

    It’s safe to say my clean eating and nutrition commitments fall down when it comes to the extent I enjoy a glass or two of wine and a beer – especially after long walks or a day at a beach.

    But, I’m getting to that point now where, because I feel so awesome the rest of the time, even without a hang over / over doing it, the bloating, the sluggishness, the general not firing on all cylinders makes me feel pretty shitty!!! Booze also weakens my willpower which means I’ll also tend to eat something I wouldn’t ordinarily and then it’s a double dose of crapola the morning after.

    I definitely find wine rewarding and relaxing. I find it’s a real joy with a gorgeous meal – be that home cooked or out. The relaxation means I’m more open, less guarded. I talk about things I perhaps wouldn’t otherwise and it definitely makes me heck of a lot more “up for it” – never ‘too tired’ after one large, one small glass…

    That said, I’ve ironically become much more aware of my alcohol consumption from a pre-conceptul point of view. I’m not necessarily at that point yet but I want to be doing all I can to make sure I’m in tip top, baby making condition.

    I gave up booze this year from mid Jan to the end of Feb. It was definitely a bit of a bind and I did genuinely miss a glass here and there. I didn’t want to get drunk. I just wanted that 250 ml which I know helps me take a big deep breath and relax that much more. It makes the conversation flow and generally the evening much more memorable. That and sitting in a bar when you don’t drink fruit juices or carbonated drinks means you’re as good as drowning in fizzy water with fresh lime when last orders are called.

    There is no firm research that can find any benefit of alcohol. All this bull the Daily Fail spouts about red wine and being good for you, nope, rubbish. The property in red wine that’s good for us is resveratrol. To get beneficial amounts of reseveratrol from red wine we’d need approximately 3L. And I don’t fancy giving that a go of an evening.

    This summer I am going on a Mindfulness course. And food and drink will be a big part in my desire to make yet more mindful decisions. I’d most certainly like to drink less than I do now but equally I don’t want to rule it out entirely if I fancy a glass as I fear I’d go a bit mad on some wild bender were I to deprive myself. I am, like you, one of life’s all or nothing-ers. I love how much I’m learning about you. That former vegetarian business is class! xxx

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:54 pm

      I like the idea of a mindfulness course – tell me more…..

      I think finding a balance is important, I don’t want to be the woman who is always first with a glass and last to leave. I would like to have a healthy relationship with both exercise and wine..

      But at the moment, and for the moment, exercise is top trumping wine.

      Reply
      • Ruth Walters says

        June 9, 2014 at 2:00 pm

        This is one of the courses I am signed up to – there is an online option but I am doing x 8 in person sessions: http://bemindful.co.uk

        I am also going to this one: http://www.ion.ac.uk/civicrm/event/info?reset=1&id=699

        If you promise to meet up with me and shout me lunch I’ll share all I learn. We should definitely get together this summer and chat all the stuff that bores other folk to death…!

        Reply
        • northernmum says

          June 9, 2014 at 10:03 pm

          I just did the stress test! 25! and yes lunch sounds great – let me know when x

          Reply
  6. (Mostly) Yummy Mummy says

    June 6, 2014 at 7:15 pm

    Go for it I say! I think this is probably the next logical step for you to want to take while you are feeling so good and embracing such huge life changes. The never say never thing is a really good way to look at it too. I’m practically teetotal these days and don’t miss it one bit. I have the very odd glass (and by odd I mean I can count on one hand how many drinks I’ve had in the last year) but that’s my lot. I can’t imagine for one minute that you’ll turn into Fun Bobby and if you do, we’ll be sure to tell you 😉

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:51 pm

      Ha! Thanks x

      Reply
  7. Actually Mummy... says

    June 7, 2014 at 7:40 am

    I’ve been thinking about this for a good couple of years actually. I did dry January this year and it extended into March, because I felt a lot better physically without it. It’s the knee-jerk thing though of walking into a pub, or going to a party that I struggle with, and once I start, the moderation stops. Which is why I find the idea of going alcohol-free so attractive. My sister in law stopped about 5 years ago and is so happy that she did. I might be just behind you x

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:50 pm

      But maybe we should wait till after BML????

      Reply
  8. Coombemill says

    June 7, 2014 at 7:50 am

    In all honesty not something I would do I still enjoy it too much but huge respect for your new view on it, you make it sound very compelling. Perhaps I could join you with an alcohol free night? I’m happy with just a glass at home but I do enjoy a couple more on a night out.

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:50 pm

      I am still deliberating, I think the main thing for me is to ditch the home drinking and save it for special occasions. – Like cake.

      Reply
  9. Mari says

    June 7, 2014 at 7:01 pm

    I’ve cut down loads over the past few years and now drink Thursday – Sunday, only in the evening and on average half a bottle. This works for me. I couldn’t give up totally as I’m quite passionate about wine but I do see my intake decreasing more as the years go by.
    Great post, makes you think

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:46 pm

      Thanks, I think age is a factor, you become more self aware.

      Reply
  10. Angela Spicer says

    June 8, 2014 at 8:54 am

    I enjoy my wine, but good for you. If the thought is in your head then it must be an avenue you are ready to explore, so I say go for it.

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 8, 2014 at 2:44 pm

      Jury is still out but am tempted

      Reply
  11. lucy says

    June 9, 2014 at 10:10 am

    Great post. I am thinking the same. I just got so much more done (not just boring things like washing, but nice things like reading) when I don’t drink. We should form a support group!
    Lucy, crumbsfood.co.uk

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      June 9, 2014 at 12:01 pm

      Great idea Lucy!

      Reply

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