The existence of God and the pressure to be funny

The existence of God and the pressure to be funny

We have a seven minute drive to school.  Within those seven minutes I can be asked in excess of 100 questions.  We have had debates on the existence of God, we have spoken about why boys have willies and girls have ginas.  We have fought, some of the car’s occupants have pulled hair, we have all sang in joyous loud unison to Mr Brightside.

Some school runs are good, others can be plain bloody awful.

Today was interesting.

Twin Boy joined me in the much desired front seat.  Snapping his belt in with a smile he beamed at me with a smile full of intent.

“Mum” he questioned, before I even started the ignition. “Mum, can I read your blog?”

Whilst being momentarily taken aback by the request, I saw this as an opportunity to enjoy a more peaceful school run.  Twin Girl was reading Fantastic Mr Fox in the back and BB was drawing on her legs in Biro – it simply wasn’t worth the fight to tell her to stop.

“Ok,” I said, and before slamming the car into reverse and setting off for school, I brought up northernmum on the phone and found an appropriate piece.  I chose one about Portugal, no swearing, no pubic hair reference, perfectly safe.

Silence followed.

Four minutes later, Twin Boy looked up at me.

“Mum,” he questioned, “I thought you were supposed to be funny?”

Taken aback again, I responded “well, didn’t you think the bit about Grandad’s skin and the Iguna was funny?”

“No, it was just true,” he retorted.

“What about the bit about mummy being so pretty she could eat for free?” I stammered, feeling the pressure to be humorous.

“Not in the slightest Mum.”

“Oh,” I faltered.

“You know that award for ‘Laugh’ that you didn’t win Mum; I can see why now, your blog simply isn’t funny.”

Tomorrow, we will be back to discussing the existence of God.

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  1. Rhian @melbs
    July 9, 2013 / 10:45 am

    Harsh! You make me laugh lovely (although not always intentionally ha ha)

    • northernmum
      July 9, 2013 / 10:18 pm

      P off”

  2. July 9, 2013 / 12:38 pm

    LOL! Well, are you going to try to be funnier for the sake of your son? 🙂
    I don’t think I want my children to read my blog yet, maybe in 5-8 years. They are still small and would not understand now …. luckily should I say?

    • northernmum
      July 9, 2013 / 10:18 pm

      I am trying! Promise

  3. July 9, 2013 / 2:45 pm

    Blimey, sounds like you’ve got a tough crowd to please at home. Still, it’ll keep you on your toes. Don’t want you resting on your laurels (and your 95% genius) now do we?!

    • northernmum
      July 9, 2013 / 10:18 pm

      Ha! did you see gemma got me a mug!

  4. July 9, 2013 / 9:14 pm

    tell him he needs to subscribe – eventually he will receive a post he finds funny.

    • northernmum
      July 9, 2013 / 10:17 pm

      From a non subscriber!

  5. July 10, 2013 / 4:40 am

    Loved it! Personally I would opened the passenger door and told Fantastic Mr Fox reader you’re swapping seats with your brother.

  6. July 10, 2013 / 4:40 am

    Loved it! Personally I would opened the passenger door and told Fantastic Mr Fox reader you’re swapping seats with your brother.

    • northernmum
      July 10, 2013 / 9:28 pm

      Very wise!

  7. July 10, 2013 / 5:22 am

    Ha! They sure tell it like it is don’t they? Tell him it’s sophisticated humour for adults….no I’m not convinced either 😉

    • northernmum
      July 10, 2013 / 9:28 pm


    • northernmum
      July 10, 2013 / 9:27 pm

      Thanks x

  8. July 10, 2013 / 10:59 am

    Sometimes children are not to be believed! You are so very funny Jane! I love twin boy’s responses, so honest and child like. Trust me when he looks back in years to come he will appreciate how funny you are (or his girlfriend will anyway)!

    • northernmum
      July 10, 2013 / 9:27 pm

      Fair point!

  9. July 10, 2013 / 11:35 am

    You’ve got to write more about the ridiculous things your kids say. That’s ALWAYS funny 😉
    I expect you on it with a vengeance for next year’s Laugh category – clearly I have had my day now, because the kids never laugh at my blog either!

    • northernmum
      July 10, 2013 / 9:27 pm

      We are two unfunny mothers 🙁 only one of us has a nice shiny trophy x

  10. July 10, 2013 / 1:24 pm

    Everyone’s a critic, and kids are a tough audience. Tell him to start his own blog!

    My kids think I’m funny. At least that’s their excuse for not taking me seriously, I think.

    • northernmum
      July 10, 2013 / 9:26 pm

      He would love his own blog, the world is not ready x

  11. July 10, 2013 / 5:13 pm

    Out of the mouths of babes eh? What a cool kid or maybe he was teasing?

    • northernmum
      July 10, 2013 / 9:26 pm

      Hmmmm not sure he teasing

  12. July 10, 2013 / 7:10 pm

    Oh dear! Sometimes a child’s mirror is the pitts! That level of honesty isn’t required…. well I think you are very funny! X.

    • northernmum
      July 10, 2013 / 9:24 pm

      why thank you

  13. July 11, 2013 / 10:53 am

    oo harsh!
    As a ‘slightly’ older reader I find your blog very funny : )

    • northernmum
      July 17, 2013 / 10:11 pm

      Why thanks Sian x

  14. July 11, 2013 / 10:11 pm

    Sounds like something E would say but then he only has a wicked sense of humour and this would be his idea of being funny 😉 xx

    • northernmum
      July 17, 2013 / 10:10 pm

      I think TB meant it to be funny – god I hope he did!

  15. July 14, 2013 / 4:05 am

    My son asked me the other day, ‘Mum why do you write a blog?’ I replied, ‘I like the challenge.’ ‘Who reads it?’ he asked. ‘Good question. Friends!’ I said. I too try and inject a few laughs in my posts. But reading other humourous blogs (like this one) is half the fun.

    • northernmum
      July 17, 2013 / 10:06 pm


    • northernmum
      August 7, 2013 / 10:04 pm

      Very true!

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