I realised a few years ago that I wasn’t as strong as I thought.
And made my peace with it.
I learnt the power of asking for help when needed, and talking to friends – even to the point of boring them when life feels hard.
And trying to savour the moments of happy – because there are many in my life.
But in recent days, a cloud has fallen on my shoulders like a weight. Things that usually I could cope with – suddenly seem harder to manage.
Diabetes – the eternal lack of sleep, work issues, money – the stress of being a single parent.
Man – even the fact that I have been on my own for 5 years has dragged me down.
You know it’s bad when being single makes you sad…..
I holidayed last week with 4 friends. How can you be sad in sunshine eh? But for times I was, and for others – I was gloriously happy.
Then I came home.
And made a decision to crack on.
Because I may not be as strong as I want, but I am a fighter.
The road back to me started at the gym.
Made me remember why I choose a sport like CrossFit.
Because an hour in my beautiful gym, can heal in a way no pill can (for me).
I was slow, the weights were lighter, I didn’t even try to go fast.
I just remembered why I came.
To feel better.
And through the sweat and the familiar ache in my limbs – I felt that flush of coping come over me.
The gym was in no way about physical health, purely a mental spa.
As I splatted into the floor with each burpee, I remembered all that was right in my world, and started to make a plan for all I want to improve.
Who would ever know burpees could be the answer.
But, it was a reminder – Make your fitness about your journey, not the person next to you. Embrace the aches, it reminds you you are alive.
And no matter what your head said, make sure you go back again…