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Northern Mum

Crossfitting, pancreas acting, single mum to three

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My son is going to jail…. ~ northernmum

I feel I should preface this post by saying I love my son.

So, I love my son….

However I live in daily fear that when he gets ‘big’ and has ‘a hairy bum like daddy’ he is destined for a live of crime….

If you say don’t touch he is liable to put his hand through it, if you say no he hears “go for it lad, do it and do it now.”

He likes to call his approach cheeky, we don’t always agree.

But I hadn’t realised how far his blatant disregard for rules went, I thought it was just his parents he chose to ignore.

Wrong again mummy.

Upon seeing a policeman in the street I commented he should be on how best behaviour, twin girl snapped to attention and turned angelic.  Even BB managed to tone down her tantrums. 

But twin boy….

He responded to law and order by saying;

“If he arrests me I’ll shake my bum, bum at him”

A little immature…..

Driving home later down country lanes my only boy turned to me and said….

“Mummy you can drive faster because no one is around so it doesn’t matter if you break the speed limit.”

I took this opportunity to be a good parent and waxed lyrical for five minutes about the dangers of speeding and accidents….

When I finished he turned to me and said,

“I see your point mummy, but really if you do something naughty but no one sees you, well then it didn’t really happen…. Just don’t get caught!”

God help me….

 

Photo header Credit

 

 

 

Comments

  1. Emma @mummymummymum says

    July 8, 2012 at 7:57 am

    Ha ha, smart boy!

    Reply
  2. northernmum says

    July 8, 2012 at 8:20 am

    or an evil mastermind….

    Reply
  3. Teresa F Morgan says

    July 8, 2012 at 5:59 pm

    Ha ha! I have two boys. A five year old obsessed with his willy, and cupping it will go ‘Oh, my acorns, my acorns.” (I have no idea where he got that from).

    Or he will pull his trousers down, and pants, and whilst mooning, say “bum bum”.

    He too is cheeky, and tries to push every single patient button I have.

    My son will have the cell next to yours 😉

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      July 8, 2012 at 6:25 pm

      Mine calls them his peanuts – and threaterns to kick me in my peanuts daily!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Seriously he snaps every last nerve I have – I love him to pieces but grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

      Reply
  4. Teresa F Morgan says

    July 8, 2012 at 5:59 pm

    I should add, my seven year old is much more sensible… Phew!

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      July 8, 2012 at 6:25 pm

      I am not sure TB can improve in six months…..

      Reply
  5. Sarah ffelan says

    July 8, 2012 at 9:07 pm

    He will go far in life!

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      July 8, 2012 at 9:20 pm

      Bloody hope so

      Reply
  6. Blue Sky says

    July 8, 2012 at 9:39 pm

    I wonder where his ideas came from?

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      July 8, 2012 at 9:40 pm

      Are you suggesting…..

      Reply
      • Blue Sky says

        July 8, 2012 at 9:47 pm

        Me suggesting something? *looks innocent*

        Reply
        • northernmum says

          July 8, 2012 at 9:48 pm

          Have you been talking to my husband?

          And for the record I have never threatened an officer of the police with my “bum bum”

          Reply
          • Blue Sky says

            July 8, 2012 at 10:11 pm

            Hmmm, not as far I know. And yes, I’m sure that’s something you’d avoid doing!

          • northernmum says

            July 9, 2012 at 1:33 pm

            Of course only when sober!

  7. Molly says

    July 9, 2012 at 5:14 am

    Best of luck with that one… he does make me laugh, that boy of yours. x

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      July 9, 2012 at 6:44 pm

      would you like to have him on short term loan?

      Reply
  8. Bod for tea says

    July 9, 2012 at 8:05 am

    Well you can’t fault his logic really can you! Ha ha, thanks for my morning chuckle yet again 😀

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      July 9, 2012 at 1:30 pm

      Anytime! X

      Reply
  9. Sian says

    July 10, 2012 at 6:17 am

    hilarious : ) well from this side! my son takes great pleasure in singing about farting and poo at every opportunity (not his – mine!)

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      July 10, 2012 at 6:59 am

      You fart and poo? I am far too much of a lady for that….

      Reply
  10. Sian says

    July 10, 2012 at 11:31 am

    well you know I try and be ladylike but obviously not enough! or the embarrassment factor is just too high for my son to resist : )

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      July 10, 2012 at 12:18 pm

      Love it – keep farting on!

      Reply
  11. Christine says

    July 10, 2012 at 9:38 pm

    Fantastic. Well, not for your current situation but that’s one smart cookie you’ve got there. Some quite complex arguments he’s putting forward i.e. the whole tree falls in a wood, no one’s around so did it make a sound? argument springs to mind. He’s not going to jail, he’s going to Oxbridge 😉

    Reply

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Jane is a working Mum of three and has great hair. One of these things may not be true.

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