• Home
  • Work with me / About me
  • Disclosure
  • Terms/Privacy Policy
    • Cookie Policy
    • Website Terms & Conditions
  • Contact

Northern Mum

Crossfitting, pancreas acting, single mum to three

  • facebook
  • twitter
  • instagram
  • youtube
  • mail

Here we go again: back by the hospital cot….

It is amazing what I know this evening that I didn’t know this morning.

I now know that a blood sugar of 29 is classed as diabetic, I also know that a blood sugar for a six-year-old girl should be five.  I now know that my lovely eldest girl is terrified of needles but can paint the bravest of faces.

I now know how it feels to have a diabetic daughter.

I have to be honest, I am not a fan of my new-found knowledge.  In fact if we are talking about being honest then I am completely fecked off.  The past two years have been interspersed with visits to hospitals, nights on wards and ambulance rides .

I thought it was over.

BB is well on the road to recovery and only a little limp remains to document the traumas her body went through at the start of the year.

But once more as the nights start to darken earlier I find myself blogging from a hospital cot settling in for some new life changes.

Twin girl has caused me to panic for a while, the house move didn’t seem to make her smile and night-time brought wet beds and sad tears.
We thought it was the move, the changes in our lives, we didn’t realise the wetting of the bed was a sign of something darker lingering in her body.

It seems when we moved house we left her pancreas behind.

We went to the doctor as a routine check, just to make sure all was well and the problem really was mental.

It isn’t.

She drinks so much to combat the dryness left by an absence of insulin, she drinks so much she can’t make it through the night.

We left the doctors directed straight to A and E and suddenly I saw my child. Pale with brown hollows round her eyes, cracked lips, lethargic, always thirsty…
How did I miss the signs?  Was I so busy working that I didn’t see my daughter going rapidly downhill.  Is it possible to appease that guilt?

We are here for a couple of days until the sugar is controlled and then Twin Girl faces a life of injections until medical science figures out a better way.
Phrases like ‘hypo’ ‘diabetic coma’ and ‘blood sugar’ already feel common place on my tongue.

I remind myself once more that it isn’t cancer, it’s not curable but it could be worse.

But for one day I want to tell the world to piss off and leave my kids alone, I want to wrap up my health and leave it for my girls under the Christmas Tree.

I don’t want this for her.

Comments

  1. Rachelradiostar says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:33 pm

    Oh Jane, that’s just so awful x In my Y6 class we have a boy diagnosed as Type 1 diabetic in the Easter Holidays, this year. His mum has been amazing. You will be amazing . Granted he is three years older, his mum told him about Steve Redgrave. He’s handling it really well. We at school have been well trained up, we know the signs. The school nurse is great. I just wanted to let you know that I’m thinking bout you and that it’s a tough journey you embark on but you’ll have a whole heap of people with you xxx

    Reply
  2. Jen aka The Mad House says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:40 pm

    OMG Jane. I do not know what to say. Life is shit, but again you will all get through this. you are strong and together you are stronger. I can not believe that Pippa has just gone through this with BB and now you are going through it. YOu have my number should you need to offload. I love you all and being the insomniac I am call anytime, the RBH can be a lonely place at night.

    Reply
  3. Liz Weston aka @TheLizWeston says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:43 pm

    I have nothing constructive to write. I am sorry about that. Just want to say, that I’m so sorry it’s gone to Rat Shit for you again. It’s too much. I hope you and your family are all back on the road again soon. Much love. And sorry again for having nowt constructive to write other than xx

    Reply
  4. Mum of One says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:43 pm

    Am so sorry, your poor little mite. And poor you. There is NOTHING worse than seeing your child ill. I know it is not much comfort at the moment but my PhD was based around diabetes, though mainly focused on eyes. However, I did come across lots of fabulous new research into treatments that don’t have to involve injections etc so hopefully it is something that with time she, and your family, will find easy to manage and not cause her too much disruption. Sending hugs x

    Reply
  5. Molly says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    Nothing more to say than what I texted you just now. Your beautiful family deserves a bloody break. Please do let me know if I can do anything to help, you know I’m just up the road. I love Mol and know she’ll be a brave girl. But you must promise me you won’t blame yourself for any of this for a second. You’re an absolutely amazing mum. xxxx

    Reply
  6. Jayne says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    I’m a diabetic too, but an adult with type II, and I often get cross about how unfair it all is that I have to take tablets every day for the rest of my life.

    And then I read posts like this and I realise what a whinging bitch I am and how I take my health for granted. I’m so sorry that you’re all going through this and that your daughter is feeling so rubbish. I know you’ll handle it all brilliantly and with the right diet she’ll be back on top form in no time.

    In the meantime, I’m sending mental hugs. xx

    Reply
  7. Mette says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:50 pm

    I’m so so sorry to hear. I don’t know what to say to make it better but I kind of know what it feels like all though it’s MS I have, not diabetes and it’s me not my child. But I fear I have passed on the the genes for them to get MS. Sorry, actually just trying to tell you I admire your way off handling everything coming your way. I enjoy reading your blog and you are very fantastic.

    Reply
  8. Kat says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:51 pm

    You didn’t miss the signs Jane; you got treatment long before the onset became an emergency. Sending you a useless internet hug x

    Reply
  9. Alyson Andrew says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:52 pm

    I’m so sorry to read this after all your family have been through, I completely recognise that feeling of guilt, of looking and thinking ‘how the actual F did I miss this’, but you are really have nothing to blame yourself for, this has crept up, not happened overnight, I remember getting Lucy’s eye and ear diagnosis and feeling appalled in that exact same way you describe. I hope life cuts you all a break soon and nights at home are more commonplace than nights by a hospital bed x

    Reply
  10. Cass@frugalfamily says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:53 pm

    I don’t have anything helpful to say other than to tell you that I’m thinking about you. I had a bad time last year with my 10 y/0 and at any point I would have happily changed places with her. Turns out she suffers from abdominal migraine and some sort of pre-maigraine auras which isn’t good but it’s a lot better than what we thought – we’ve found ways to deal with the tummy cramps and pains she regularly gets and although diabetes is obviously more serious than what Bethan has, you’ll find ways to cope too and it wont seem quite as bad in a few months time. When you get chance you should speak to @PippaD, she’ll have some great advice for you x x

    Reply
  11. HELEN says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:55 pm

    oh shit Jane, poor you…& poor Molly. I was going to ask you how she was getting on. Don’t beat yourself up about not seeing the signs, you just wouldn’t expect it. Take care & I hope you all get a break from this shit soon
    Big hugs
    xx

    Reply
  12. Emily (@amummytoo) says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:56 pm

    I’m so sorry you all have to go through this. I can only imagine how you’re feeling and it’s not nice. But you will cope, just like you’ve coped before. You’re all amazing. Hugs to you and a kick in the nuts to karma, who seems to be completely fecking clueless lately. xxxx

    Reply
  13. Jenny @cheetahsinshoes says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:56 pm

    All I can say is that I can empathise wholeheartedly with writing from next to a hospital cot – it’s an experience that no-one would want to do once, let alone again and again. Sending you strength, love, bravery, determination and even more love

    Reply
  14. susanne@babyhuddle says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:58 pm

    Oh Jane 🙁 massive hugs for you. Don’t blame yourself, although I know u will. Wish I could take it away tooxx

    Reply
  15. Steph says

    October 31, 2012 at 7:58 pm

    Sorry to hear this, I know that doesn’t help, wish I could change things for you. Glad they have ‘found’ it though, and that they can do something about it. Hope you manage to leave and avoid the hospitals very soon, get back to the warmth and cosiness of home where it all won’t seem so bad. Sending virtual hugs x

    Reply
  16. Emma @mummymummymum says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:06 pm

    Oh Jane. I don’t know what to say, sending you and twin girl a big hug. I hope you get home soon. xxx

    Reply
  17. Domestic Goddesque says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:07 pm

    I cannot imagine having to go through all the crap that you’ve been through of late and being able to deal with it any way near as well as you have been. You rock. You really do. You have more support and love than you can imagine.

    Reply
  18. Amy Le Pelley says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:07 pm

    We are thinking of you all Jane, big hugs and I hope you are back home soon. Much love Amy x

    Reply
  19. Kate, WitWitWoo says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:10 pm

    Oh Jane. Sending lots of love xxx

    Reply
  20. Very Bored in Catalunya says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:13 pm

    Not really sure what to say here. Life really can be shit sometimes. I do know that you’ll all come admirably through this and you won’t let it stand in her way. Sending big love. xx

    Reply
  21. Kirsten says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:13 pm

    Keep being amazing Jane xx Sending you lots of love xx

    Reply
  22. Sharon donnelly says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:15 pm

    So sorry to read this. I can’t believe you guys have been dealt a shit hand again!! You’re all so strong though and you will get through it. Don’t beat yourself up either, you’re a great mum! x

    Reply
  23. Aly says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:17 pm

    Oh Jane, don’t blame yourself.How were you to know? Sending hugs x

    Reply
  24. Nickie says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:21 pm

    How awful for you – it’s awful to think that you’ve just finished with all the medical stuff and think you’re just going to get on with a “normal” life. Sending loads of love to you and yours.

    Reply
  25. geekmummy says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:24 pm

    Oh no Jane 🙁 *hugs*

    Reply
  26. Emma says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:25 pm

    FFS shit #that is all. Have called will try again later. Love you all. xxxx

    Reply
  27. Helen Neale says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:25 pm

    Bless you my dear – such an utter shock, and don’t be too hard on yourself for not spotting the signs…you just don’t look for them as you don’t think its gonna happen. Life can be such an arse sometimes….

    Reply
  28. Circus Queen says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:26 pm

    Oh Jane, what horrid news! Don’t you beat yourself up though. If you’re not looking for signs of diabetes, why would you see them? I’m sorry this is happening.

    Reply
  29. Liska says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:27 pm

    Oh my God. Sending you love and of course to your strong wee lass. Dear God. Take care. Sending you strength, support and love and I am so sorry.
    Take care,
    Liska xx

    Reply
  30. Ali says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:30 pm

    Hugs to you Jane x No blame to you it does creep up suddenly but agree it is time you had a positive break. Your good hand will be dealt to you soon I am sure x Another test of strength but here like you, different reasons it would be nice to have a easy deal just for a while.

    Though I am suspecting you were missing that hospital tea x Yeah humour used, always deflects the crap, right? Keep strong Mrs, you will because that is what we do x x x

    Reply
  31. Tasha Goddard says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:33 pm

    What shit. But you will come through. And they will find a cure. There are some fantastic scientists out there looking for one and they will find one. It might take a few years yet, but I am convinced that BB will not have to live with it her whole life. In the meantime, she’ll get used to it and so will you (horrid though that seems). Lots of big cyber hugs to you all. T xxx

    Reply
  32. Maggy says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:35 pm

    Oh my goodness! I don’t know what to say. Life is definitely dealing you and your lovely children a shitty hand. How awful for twin girl. Hugs to you all. 🙁 maggy

    Reply
  33. Kara says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:50 pm

    I am so sorry to hear your news. If it makes you feel any better (and I know it won’t), you get used to the constant needles to test blood sugar, administer insulin etc – after a while it just stops hurting and becomes routine but its still a miserable thing to go through. It sounds like you have a very brave young lady and I know you are a fab mum so you will get through this! Medical advances happen all the time and you never know what’s around the corner.
    My only advise is get yourself to your local support group – it really will help you and little one xx

    Reply
  34. Michelle @ Simplify, Live, Love says

    October 31, 2012 at 8:58 pm

    Oh Jane. How terrible. I’m so sorry to read your news. Healing thoughts leaving Iowa and heading to you.

    Reply
  35. scottish mum says

    October 31, 2012 at 9:03 pm

    Twin girl is on the road to feeling better, even with the insulin and the horrible needles that she will always dislike, but hopefully will get used to. You did see the signs, which is why you too her to the doctors. In our family, I always have a bag of jelly beans as the sugar works quicker in them than glucose tablets for my mother if she hypo’s out and about.

    Best of wishes, and good luck to you all.

    x

    Reply
  36. Bex @ the mummy adventure says

    October 31, 2012 at 9:04 pm

    I can’t imagine how you and twin girl are feeling but I hope now there is a way t help control then there will be some smiles. Thinking of you both x

    Reply
  37. Mari says

    October 31, 2012 at 9:09 pm

    I hear you Northern Mum and I am sending as much love as I possibly can because I am unable to do anything else.

    Reply
  38. Jacq says

    October 31, 2012 at 9:15 pm

    Ah feck. That’s a shitty hand you’ve been dealt. As you say, it’s not cancer but it’s still horrible.

    Reply
  39. LauraCYMFT says

    October 31, 2012 at 9:23 pm

    Sometimes life is so shite to good people! Sending thoughts to you all.

    Reply
  40. Trish says

    October 31, 2012 at 9:24 pm

    So sorry to read this, Jane. Life is so unfair. You’re a strong wonderful woman so you and your family will cope, but I realise that doesn’t help much at the moment. Be kind to yourself. Lots of love xxx

    Reply
  41. Notmyyearoff says

    October 31, 2012 at 9:33 pm

    Oh Hun, I hope you are ok. My mums whole family is diabetic and I am very high risk but it’s something I’ve seen since I was little with them. You can’t have known with the symptoms because they can be v v similar to just a very active child wanting to quench their thirst. I hope Twin girl is ok now. Sending you lots of good wishes and hugs.

    Reply
  42. Blue sky says

    October 31, 2012 at 10:52 pm

    You all so need a break, I can’t believe that life can be so unfair 🙁 Hope you’re getting plenty of support in the hospital and that twin girl is coping as well as she can xx

    Reply
  43. Liveotherwise says

    October 31, 2012 at 11:27 pm

    Huge hugs and love and strength to you.

    Reply
  44. Sarah ffelan says

    November 1, 2012 at 12:10 am

    Sorry to hear this. Bless her little cotton socks. But from what i’ve read on your blog over last few months, you are made of strong, hardy stuff and will get through this. Sending you and your brave little girl positive thoughts xx

    Reply
  45. Actually Mummy says

    November 1, 2012 at 1:03 am

    Oh crap! What a shitty deal you’ve had this year 🙁 cant really think of anything better to say other than on the basis of the pleasure pain principle I hope fate is storing up something fecking awesomely good for you next year!

    Reply
  46. rhian @melbs says

    November 1, 2012 at 4:02 am

    Oh JP, I don’t really know what to say here that will make you feel any better about the crapness of this, but know that there is no way that this is your fault, don’t blame yourself, you are a fabulous mum with 3 cracking kids that are a testimony to that. Molls is a fighter and she will get through this and so will you. Sending you loads of hugs and kisses xxxxxxxxxxxxx Love ya

    Reply
  47. Caroline says

    November 1, 2012 at 7:27 am

    Hello lovely lady. You’re allowed to be angry and f***ed off and all of those things. Of everyone you guys deserve a break and knowing it could be worse doesn’t mean it feels any less shite. You’re a brilliant mum, you’ll do great again and your lovely dancing girl will be back soon. Tell the guilty to feck off too. Thinking of you all and sending big squeezy hug from Scotland x x

    Reply
  48. Middle-Aged Matron says

    November 1, 2012 at 9:31 am

    Horrified to read this. You’ll both be at the top of my thoughts.

    Reply
  49. Annick Hollins says

    November 1, 2012 at 9:54 am

    Can totally understand you wanting life to leave your kids alone for a while. So sorry to hear this news about Twin Girl. Wow – huge news for you all to cope with and digest. Big hugs all round xxx

    Reply
  50. Mel (MilkChic Breastfeeding Fashion) says

    November 1, 2012 at 10:44 am

    Oh love! What a year 🙁 Stop the guilty – it’s so easy to see the big picture with hindsight and it’s not the first thing anyone would think of. I hope her blood sugar balances and you get to grips with it soon. At least if she has to be diabetic, she has been diagnosed early and will be used to looking after herself before she hits her teens and the hormones unsettle things again. Lots of love to you and yours xxx

    Reply
  51. older mum in a muddle says

    November 1, 2012 at 11:47 am

    Oh no – I am so sorry to hear this, especially after everything you have been through with BB. It feels like the hospital is an unwanted second home to you. At the very least you now know what the problem was – but so scary in the way it seemed to come from nowhere – the symptoms kicking in when you recently moved! Big hugs to you all. X.

    Reply
  52. scarlettruby says

    November 1, 2012 at 4:08 pm

    Oh Jane – what to say except thinking about all of you. BUT – it’s not fatal – it is manageable – and you WILL manage. love to all of you.

    Reply
  53. headinbook says

    November 1, 2012 at 8:03 pm

    I am really sorry to hear that you (and your little girl) find yourself at the foot of yet another hill to climb, when you so deserve some time on the level ground.

    I don’t have anything helpful to say; I am sure that this will all be taken in your stride and become a part of life, but it’s just not fair that it’s happened at all.

    Best wishes x

    Reply
  54. amummysview says

    November 2, 2012 at 9:18 pm

    oh god honey you do have a rough ride. poor little thing! I guess at least they know what it is and she can take steps to feeling better in herself, not easy and not nice though *hugs* for you all x

    Reply
  55. Jo from Bouche in the City says

    November 3, 2012 at 11:37 pm

    Oh Hun. Big hugs to you. It will be tough for you but you are a tough cookie and you will get through this. I knew a girl at school who had diabetes and she was great with the daily injections and food restrictions. If twin girl is anything like her mother she will cope amazingly x x x

    Reply
  56. Becky says

    September 13, 2013 at 8:47 am

    I’m so so sorry to hear. I don’t know what to say to make it better but I kind of know what it feels like.

    Reply
    • northernmum says

      September 15, 2013 at 8:42 pm

      Thanks

      Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Dancing with Diabetes and laughing in the face of spica..... - Northern Mum says:
    November 17, 2012 at 10:31 am

    […] put insulin into her leg and then pull on a costume and take centre stage for a dance exam that no bout in hospital was going to stop her […]

    Reply
  2. Why thrush is a girls best friend........ (how to spot Type One Diabetes in Children) - Northern Mum says:
    December 6, 2012 at 11:11 pm

    […] has been five weeks to the day since twin girl was dramatically rushed into A & E, in five weeks she has injected 140 life saving insulin injections into her arms, legs and tummy.  […]

    Reply
  3. Type 1 diabetes: Being more than just a number... - Northern Mum says:
    January 22, 2013 at 1:42 am

    […] the October diagnosis of Type 1 diabetes twin girl and I have both started to refer to her in a numeric […]

    Reply
  4. Fate is an ironic bastard... - Northern Mum says:
    January 28, 2013 at 9:50 pm

    […] took a while for us to notice the signs of twin girl’s diabetes, we put the excessive bed wetting down to the stress of moving house and we just simply failed to […]

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Jane is a working Mum of three and has great hair. One of these things may not be true.

Subscribe to Blog via Email

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 10,122 other subscribers

Categories

  • All Posts
  • BB's journey with DDH
  • Breastfeeding
  • mummyblog
  • Paleo / Crossfitting
  • Reviews / Featured Content
  • Travel / Out and About
  • Twin Girl and Type 1 Diabetes
  • Uncategorized

Tots 100

TOTS100 - UK Parent Blogs
TOTS100

Search

Follow on Bloglovin

Follow on Bloglovin

Previously on northernmum….

Awards!

Tots100 MAD Blog Awards

Looking to Save Money?

Check out my thrify blog, full of ideas to eat and play well  – for less money!

www.fromspendingtosaving.co.uk

Northern Mum

Copyright © 2019 Northern Mum Crossfitting, pancreas acting, single mum to three
Site design with help from DigitalJen

Copyright © 2021 · Slush Pro on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in

This website uses cookies to improve your experience. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish.Accept Read More
Privacy & Cookies Policy

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled

Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. These cookies do not store any personal information.

Non-necessary

Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website.

SAVE & ACCEPT