Slapped in the face ~ Northernmum

Slapped in the face ~ Northernmum

A moment to breathe, to pause to reflect. A slap in the face perhaps to wake up to reality.

Perspective is needed.

My children are ageing at a speed I don’t enjoy; my baby now toddles, my six year olds bicker. I am not twenty four any more dreaming of my future, I am a wife, a mother who juggles it all with a career. I am living my life.

“You don’t play mummy” the words etched into my heart spoken by my six year old girl. It’s not strictly true but I don’t play enough.

When my first borne were ‘named’ we read them a poem promising to neglect the cobwebs and play with them often. Often with the fairground ride that is life I lose sight of what it truly important. In trying to cover what is needed to survive it is easy to miss what is needed to enjoy.

My vision has been clouded, I need a moment to push those clouds away.

This last year has not been as expected, hospitals and casts have played havoc with normality, caring for a disabled child has forced us to uncomfortable financial times.

But look what I have;

A laughing lovely daughter, standing tall, cast free, for the first time in seven months; a cheeky, sometimes downright wicked boy who makes me howl with his antics. A sweet, sensitive daughter who can spend hours creating worlds with plastic, fake chested Barbies and wants nothing more that her mummy to join in.

I am richer than I ever dreamed, I just needed a moment to remember.

Life is too precious to squander, each moment must be lived rather than survived. To my children I promise to try harder, to make each second count, to maybe get the play doh out of storage.

Two blogs forced my perspective, slapped me round the face and made me appreciate what I have with passion.

 Tas I hope your week gets better and thanks for reminding me what counts and to the lovely Kerry, you are in my thoughts and prayers keep fighting and make it home.

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45 Comments

  1. August 1, 2012 / 6:29 pm

    That’s lovely. Well written. I’m having one day of leave each week of the school hols, and making up the time when they are in bed, because I just want to hang out with them – to see them hit a ball at their tennis camp, to go swimming, to play in the garden. I’m not doing the jobs that desperately need doing, I’m hanging out with them. They won’t want our kisses and snuggles soon, so I’m making the most of them whilst I can. I’m praying for Kerry and her family as well. God bless them x

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:20 pm

      xxxx

  2. August 1, 2012 / 7:12 pm

    Both of those posts had exactly the same effect on me too. It’s so easy to get swept up in the unimportant things in life, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about Kerry all day. It’s just so scary and I can’t imagine how her family must be feeling. I really hope she is okay xx

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:19 pm

      me too x x

  3. August 1, 2012 / 7:13 pm

    Lovely post – perhaps instead of trying harder you could do the opposite – try softer! Relax and enjoy. x

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:19 pm

      will try ross 🙂

  4. August 1, 2012 / 7:14 pm

    Such a lovely post. I’m sure we are all guilty of not playing enough and it can be hard to juggle everything we need to do as parents. As you say though, life is too precious.

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:18 pm

      It is and recent events have really shown that x

  5. August 1, 2012 / 7:15 pm

    Ahhhhh thank you, you made me nearly cry! :).

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:18 pm

      whoops sorry x

  6. August 1, 2012 / 7:27 pm

    Perspective is something we all need. I have a message chalked on my chalk wall (yes I am so hip and with it) in the kitchen. It reads Remember we are not managing an inconviences, we are raising children.

    My thoughts are with Kerry and her family. It took a near death experience to make me really appreciate my lot. I hope that she improves and that other people cuddle their children very hard tonight

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:18 pm

      cuddling hard is something i intend to do – and playing more!

  7. August 1, 2012 / 8:02 pm

    Couldn’t agree more. It’s easy to lose perspective of the important things in life when the rhythms of the day hurtle on around us. But you’re right, the important things are our health and our family. As long as we have these, it’s happy days.

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:17 pm

      amen to that

  8. August 1, 2012 / 8:03 pm

    Lovely post. I am certainly rethinking on what I am doing with my life since hearing about Kerry. I really hope she gets better soon.

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:16 pm

      God we all do x

  9. Helen
    August 1, 2012 / 8:59 pm

    thanks Jane, I needed that. I spend far too much time stressing about this house and wishing the time away so I’m not in constant demand (especially whilst on the loo!) but soon I will be redundant to their needs and will miss that. I should be having laughs and fun with the kids……must try harder! x

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:16 pm

      to be fair a bit of toilet time is always nice

  10. August 1, 2012 / 10:04 pm

    Very poignant thoughts. I’m at the stage that I want my 12 yo to go play outside and entertain himself! Yet I still feel guilty. You’re right….sod the house, let’s all go do fun stuff!

    xx Jazzy

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:15 pm

      🙂

  11. August 1, 2012 / 11:48 pm

    Thank you for the reminder, I needed to hear that tonight. My eight year old (when he was seven) said “Mummy you never play with me.” I think I’m always saying “In a minute…” I need to get better at ignoring the mess, which frankly will always be there whatever I do. I think we also need to go out less and stop being so busy all the time. I WILL do better…

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:15 pm

      The mess is hard to ignore though! and sometimes children play rubbish games! 🙂

  12. August 2, 2012 / 5:21 am

    Beautiful post and so true-I need to play more too. What a beautiful girl you have- a real fighter too.

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:14 pm

      Thanks

  13. August 2, 2012 / 8:28 am

    Mothers are pre-programmed to feel guilty, however much they do. Interestingly it’s a modern pressure to feel you have to engage with your children. In other centuries people were either too busy toiling for survival or too posh to spend quality time with their kids. Even our parents generation were turned out to play all day while the mothers got on with the never-ending housework. It’s a good thing that we try to play more, but an extra burden on our consciences.

      • northernmum
        Author
        August 2, 2012 / 4:11 pm

        she is a wise lady!

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:14 pm

      Very well said xxx

  14. Helloitsgemma
    August 2, 2012 / 10:01 am

    Becoming unemployed gave me more time with my son and I’ve really appreciated that. We are poorer financially but have gained massively in terms of time and energy available. I’m still guilty of not playing enough. Perfect post Mrs.

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:14 pm

      thanks G

  15. August 2, 2012 / 11:29 am

    Think we are all guilty of this sometimes whether your a stay at home mum or work full time. Sometimes we just need that reminder.

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:10 pm

      indeed x

  16. August 2, 2012 / 1:30 pm

    You are so right, its so easy to get caught up in the drudgery of day to day life and not realise how lucky we really are.

    Hugs. xxxx

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 4:10 pm

      back at ya missus

  17. August 2, 2012 / 7:06 pm

    I think we all berate ourselves once the kids are in bed for not doing enough with them during the day. We put them off with ‘just a minute’ and they often get so good at distracting themselves that the minute never happens. I must admit to having had a pang of needing to focus on what matters every day after reading about Kerry. Nice post to write 🙂

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 2, 2012 / 8:03 pm

      xxxx x

  18. August 2, 2012 / 9:35 pm

    I have been told the same in the past 🙁
    It’s such hard work being fun all the time with so much to do and still trying to carve out a minute of time for yourself! I want to do more, need to more and will make a point to.. xxx

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 3, 2012 / 6:31 am

      This parenting lark is hard work x

  19. August 3, 2012 / 9:23 pm

    Yes life flies by and the mundane things get in the way of our time with our kids, good to get some perspective, but very sad for Tas and especially Kerry, hope next week is better for her.

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 4, 2012 / 2:34 pm

      Me too x

  20. August 4, 2012 / 8:03 am

    I followed the links from your post (wish all of them well) , put everything in perspective today!
    Now to practice living in the moment : )

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 4, 2012 / 2:36 pm

      Not a bad way to live

  21. August 4, 2012 / 12:35 pm

    That was a wonderfully written post – standing back and taking stock of all that’s lovely and good in your life – your children etc.

    • northernmum
      Author
      August 4, 2012 / 2:35 pm

      Thanks very much x

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