It’s that time of the month again. You can see the misery etched on my face and the pain shuddering through my body from the sleep deprivation that this monthly occurrence brings.
“Why!” I cry aloud at 2am when I am awoken from slumber and then am not able to go back to sleep.
“No” I yell at 4am when it happens again and my weary body is close to collapse.
It’s such a cruel pain and a hard time and it affects both me and BB…
I have decided to do something about it this month; and today will see me painting on concealer to hide the dark spots under my eyes and heading to the pharmacy to buy every known remedy known to the modern mother in order to combat my monthly agony aka BB’s teething traumas.
I can see two of the little bastards hovering under her top gum, they leave her in relative peace during the day but come nightfall they emerge with pitchforks trying to break through the pink flesh, causing her to squeal in torment and me to writhe in pain with the knowledge that my sleep time is over.
Calpol has deserted me; the soon to be teeth laugh at the flourescent liquid as it trickles past them knowing that within the hour the numbness will go and their stabbing can continue.
Ironically really as it takes about an hour for he who helped create them to settle me back to sleep with comforting words and lullabies. Then the shrill shriek calls me again from the nursery; the cry that says;
“Mummy my toothipegs are giving me grief bring forth the big boob so I can take comfort and maybe bite it a little to share the pain.”
And so I go unable to ignore the call of the teething baby banshee.
So modern science don’t fail me now; its been a week since I last had unbroken sleep and I am down to my last nerve.
I have two credit cards and a Visa Debit so please be assured I am serious about spending a lot of money in store today.
Boots, MotherCare, Lloyds the Chemist, even Tesco’s own brand show me what you’ve got; I am a mum on a mission to defeat the teeth.
To all other parents of teething baby banshees out there, I am thinking of you in this incredibly hard time. Stay strong and united we will save our children from the pain of the tootsies.
Please note this post was written by a sleep deprived mum therefore any spelling or grammer mistakes are perfectly acceptable as is any wild over dramatisation.
**By the way my little blog has been shortlisted in the MAD blog Awards; I am really flattered, if you want to help me win please click on this voting link and enter your name and email and my blog has been shortlisted in Best Mad Blog about Family life (the first one); just click ‘northern mum’ – Thanks from me, twin boy, twin girl, BB, and he who helped create them x x x
mothersalwaysright says
I feel your pain. Have you tried the Tooth ASBO? Worked for us. And that strange powder stuff that looks like Class A narcotics but is actually a homeopathic teething remedy. Thoughts with the Big Boob at this difficult time.
janeblackmore says
How the hell does one apply teething powder?
does she snort it?
Kerry says
Oh I feel your pain, I have for to many real life memories of Baba teething I wasn’t breast feeding but I remember sitting there leaning against the cot with a finger in his mouth so he could chew! I pray for you that it doesn’t last long. xx
janeblackmore says
thanks kerry x
DeliciousNessy says
My friend swore by Ashton & Parsons teething powders. 20 sachets in a pack. She said it was like baby crack and saved her sanity.
Go forth and try!
janeblackmore says
do they do mummy crack per chance?
DeliciousNessy says
ps – I think you just pour this stuff into their mouths…
janeblackmore says
Sweet jaysus just took two of us to pour it in and now she is beaming like a looney!
that stuff rocks
Jordan says
Hope they come through soon – teeth are such a design fault by the normally very gracious mother nature. She must have been having a bad day the day teeth were designed!
janeblackmore says
Hell yes! Who needs teeth anyway! BB has coped well the last 11 months as a toothless wonder!
PoorParenting says
Calprofen is all I can recommend. The dose size is half that of calpol (but if you accidentally double dose it doesn’t kill them and they do sleep rather well. Ahem)
janeblackmore says
Hmmm “accidentally” eh…..
eviegracesmummy says
Martini works well for me! I would like to mention I drink it not Evie! It numbed my pain and helped me sleep ;0). Hope BB doesn’t suffer too long x
janeblackmore says
Fabulous advice!
Teawithonesugarplease says
you can those gummy dummies they bite down on , you can chill em in the fridge and because of the shape its harder to spit out (like a gumshield) or just ignore the cries, wear ear plugs and go back to sleep. x
janeblackmore says
Think I need better ear plugs! and door locks….
Lorraine Berry says
Liquid anbesol worked wonders with mine. Dab onto their gums and numbs it – much better than bonjela, which they just eat! 10month old is teething again now – has 6 already and think he’s tryi g to push them all through before his first birthday!
janeblackmore says
Eeeek! BB only has two and we dont want any more!
Michelle Twin Mum says
Yep teething powers, just pour into their mouth. You were still alllowed Medised when mine were young and then they changed the rules and I didn’t! Works wonders…..
Mich x
janeblackmore says
Yeah the twins could have medised but it seems BB can’t…
Erica says
Remember this well. Thankfully past for us now. Didn’t really find anything that worked brilliantly but got by with Calpol, ibuprofen for kids & bongela.
janeblackmore says
And I have all three! Plus granules, plus eight billion teethinh rings.
Thanks for dropping by erica x
Bod for tea says
Bongela works for DD, sometimes. She’s got 16 now. 4 more to go for a full house *sigh*. And now she’s almost 2 we’re supposed to take her to the dentist. Ha ha!
Kirsten says
Anbesol is great! It works instantly!
janeblackmore says
Thanks K x
mummymummymum says
I have nothing to recommend that hasn’t already been said, but am cringing at the thought of boob biting 🙂
I voted by the way….( for you, in case that wasn’t clear )
x
janeblackmore says
Ha! thanks mrs
Abs says
amber teething anklets/necklaces. i swear by ours!
got ours from here
http://www.dinodaisy.co.uk/
been a lurker reader for a while now-voted for you 🙂 x
janeblackmore says
Ooooh thanks for lurking and for commenting and for recommending! x
Muddling Along says
Amber necklaces and ambusol on the gums worked best for us
sarsm says
I’m so glad to be finished with this bit. Awful. Hope things are better now (I’m finally catching up on my blog reading…)
janeblackmore says
lol, nice to have you back!