The mummy blogging world is a unique alternate dimension to visit, full of diverse interesting parents you can encounter a range of blogs from the hilarious to the sombre. Some will be well written others look like a child wrote them and in some cases that can also be the truth.
If you choose to join this world as blogger then check out my hints below for ways to increase your status in the community and ways to increase traffic to your blog.
But firstly let me reassure you its not about the page views, unique stats, volume of comments or number of subscribers, you should write for pleasure not to be read.
Now let me uncross my fingers and tell anyone who has bothered to read this far how to get those crucial numbers up.
1. Be a parent, or at least be pregnant or trying to conceive; if not your blog may seem a little out of sorts in the mummy blogging world.
2. Give up the day job or become an insomniac, mummy blogging is all consuming. If you don’t have childcare then get it or at least find a drawer you can keep the kids in.
3. Give us your life story, warts an all. And whilst I don’t wish to put misery upon you there is nothing that goes down a storm on a blog that a bit of bad news. Keep your readers engaged though, leave Eastenders style cliff hangers, but don’t forget the happy ending.
4. Take at least 3 hours a day to read other blogs; (again see point 2) ensure you comment intelligently as I find ‘great blog’ often ends up in a spam list along with recommendations for penis enlargers.
5. Take time to understand social networking; twitter is no longer something birds do. Digg seems to have feck all to do with spades and stumbleupon is nowt to do with falling over. Again after 6 months on the blogging circuit I can tell you I am miles away from understanding digging and fallingover but then you know I write only for pleasure not for numbers.
*uncrosses fingers once more*
6. Use your kids to make good content; after the hell of pregnancy and labour they owe you something. I deliberately un potty trained twin boy (easier than you think) when I started blogging so I could regale the world with tales of inappropriate pooing incidents.
7. When all inspiration leaves you have a good old rant about your other half. I must warn you a consequence of this is divorce but again refer to point 3, those numbers will zoom.
8. Learn to speak twit language; this will help when promoting your blog on twitter, commenting on blogs and as an added bonus speaking to your teenagers. Also to save you any embarrassment later – lol does not mean lots of love. This recent discovery upset me lately as where I thought I was adored it turns out people are actually laughing at me.
9. Spend 2 hours a day minimum dancing on blog hops, taking photos for a sunday and wednesday and then 2 more hours a day commenting on everyone else’s hopping and picture taking.
10. Sell your soul to a PR agency, they give you free stuff and if you choose to give up your job over work that free stuff will go down a storm on Ebay.
11. Finally check your stats hourly if not more frequently because that really helps them go higher.
Please any other hints leave them below but don’t feel obliged I am just happy you popped by and read. In fact I am just happy I wrote this post, I may not even publish…